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|With me, it is walking a battlefield, looking at positions either from an offensive or defensive posture, trying to imagine myself as a soldier at that time in that place and the feelings of anticipation, fear, awe, pain, anguish, loathing, hope and despair that those who walked, fought, bled, and died there felt. Most of the time I spend on a battlefield, I spend with a lump in my throat that will NOT go away... I hate it and love it at the same time. I literally count the days to when I can go again and when there, spend the time with teary eyes...I think I may be crazy.